


The Lemonade of Spite

by glitterandlube



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-07
Updated: 2010-08-07
Packaged: 2017-10-10 23:46:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/105774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterandlube/pseuds/glitterandlube
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>You have to read Eleveninches' fiction fiction in order for this one to make sense as this is Rodney's POVst of eleveninches' story. It's called stealing with permission.</p><p>Beta by Eleveninches, who gave me permission to write/post this.</p>
    </blockquote>





	The Lemonade of Spite

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [If You Could Read My Mind](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/1279) by Eleveninches. 



> You have to read Eleveninches' fiction fiction in order for this one to make sense as this is Rodney's POVst of eleveninches' story. It's called stealing with permission.
> 
> Beta by Eleveninches, who gave me permission to write/post this.

Earlier that morning, Simpson had found a device that she actually pushed onto Rodney's skin when he was half-asleep and thinking, "TURN ON, COFFEE MAKER." The science lab techs had found it an ideal way to sneak around Rodney's definite 'do not touch things that cause your death' rule. Rodney had jumped in the air when he saw the device light up. He glared at Simpson who waved the flat box around in the air while making wild statements like, "Maybe it kills Wraith," and, "It could grow you more hair!"

Rodney was just reaching out to maim her with his bare hands when the device flashed and every liquid in the room turned yellow. The yellow of lemonade. Rodney froze and slowly turned to the coffee machine that was pumping out hot, vile, liquid of doom. He reached out for Simpson again; maiming her wasn't really going to cover it. Fortunely, for her, that was the exact time that Lorne came in to tell Rodney that John had mysteriously collapsed in Zelenka's closet of death and post-it notes.

Rodney hurried over to the infirmary, muttering vile, evil things about the people who work for him, the people he knows, the entire planet, random plant life, and also -- when he looked up -- the water that went through the desalination tubes was yellow. Rodney paused in his hurrying to think very seriously about going back to that super-powers machine so he could give himself the ability to set people on fire with his mind.

If only it didn't all end in certain death or tentacle jello. Rodney walked stiffly past the water of doom, and arrived in the infirmary to see John, once again, passed out in a manly way. Rodney squinted at John's hair; it looked kind of flat and miserable. Teyla and Ronon came into right behind him, and they all played a game of fake Uno to pass the time. Fake Uno is much like real Uno, only you play the Atlantis way, which involves Teyla winning no matter what.

They heard a moaning sound from the bed, and Rodney went to grab a glass of water, but it was yellow. He sighed, and watched Teyla hover around John. "Are you okay, John?" Teyla asked, as John pulled himself into a sitting position. They all watched as John started to shake, and then curled himself up on himself, while still sitting up. Teyla and Rodney both looked at Dr. Keller as Ronon put a hand on John's shoulder. John gasped and they all looked at him, as Dr. Keller came over to shine a light into his eyes and poke at him.

John said something about 'getting the wind knocked out of him' and Rodney's brain clicked and suddenly, "Oh no." They all looked at him, and he made a face. "You didn't pick up something egg shaped out of the closet of hoarding paper and glue, did you?"

John looked over at Rodney and said, "I thought it was a paperweight."

Rodney shook his head. "It's a device that we found a few years back. It causes the person who touches it to feel only anguish. Kavanagh found it. We knew no good would come of it."

Ronon snapped, "What the hell is the purpose of that?"

In lieu of answering him, Rodney said, "You have to wait for the..." Rodney waved his hand here. "Emotions to take their course. The only cure is touching."

Everyone in the room gawked at him. He said, "What? I didn't design it." Rodney wouldn't make something like that. What's the point? It's like a machine designed to make you need hugs. Rodney would make a machine designed to make people give you blow jobs. He believed in practical inventions. It was not his fault the Ancients were crazy hippies.

Ronon made a joke about rounding up hot women, and John shrank in on himself.

"This is starting to sound like a really bad after school special," Rodney said, sighing. He wanted some serious credit for not making about 17 different 'show me on the doll where the bad man touched you' remarks. He figured John would probably not take that well. Call it a hunch. Rodney didn't want shot again if he could help it. He carefully checked to see if John was still armed.

Twenty minutes later, John's eyes were wet and he was thinking about being five years old and wondering why his dad didn't talk to his mom or want to play catch with him. Anything would be better than this, even being groped by a replicator. Maybe not Oberon.

Meanwhile, Rodney was out in the hallway, sliding past the water towers and trying to figure out if John was ever going to give in and let someone touch him. He was also wondering if John's hair would try to eat him if he did. He weighed that one against other ways to die, and thought the hair was probably the least of all evils. Then someone spilled water on him, and he shrieked horribly for ten minutes straight. Luckily, it only looked citrusy and wrong.

He went back to the lab, where he still couldn't bring himself to drink the coffee. Zelenka took long, meaningful sips, and made various 'yum coffee' noises until Rodney kicked him out to take his turn molesting John. Rodney made his way to the infirmary a little bit later, after turning off the doom device, and testing his now-brown coffee about fifteen times just to be really sure. John's face was all scrunched up, and his hair was still flat. Rodney thought, 'Wow, he's such a baby,' and kicked his shoes off before climbing on the bed.

He grabbed John's hand, and nothing happened. Rodney shrugged, got out his tablet, and started clicking away, trying to figure out if he could make Zelenka allergic to something out of spite. Maybe post-it notes. They had some special glue? He was drawn away by Dr. Keller saying something about John's heart rate spiking and he looked over to see John. Oh. _Oh._ Rodney laced their fingers together and thought, "Okay, today wasn't a total write-off," and he stroked his thumb over John's wrist. Back and forth, making sure it brushed over the veins he could see in John's wrist, near his pulse.

He smiled a little bit at the sudden change in John's breathing, and when Dr. Keller said, "You have one hour left," Rodney thought about how less than one hour could sometimes mean the difference between life and death for them, but right now he got to sit here and hold John's hand, and wait for the next hour with nothing at all to stop him.

He said, without looking, "One more hour."

John whispered back, "No rush."


End file.
